A child needs a mother

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I just finished reading news about a 13-year old who hanged himself because he felt neglected and unloved by his own mother. This incident is just one of the many suicidal incidents we heard over the news or read on news paper. It is very alarming. :(

I become a mother at the age of 24. I am already working and people would think that I am at the peak of my career when I got pregnant. I got pregnant out of wedlock. I knew then that many people would criticize me, will question about my pregnancy and all. But I didn’t think about them. What I thought of was the interest of my baby to be. I thought about the baby’s future and how I would be able to give birth safely. I was lucky that Tata didn’t leave me. He supported me all the way and he was there when I gave birth. :)

I did not come from wealthy family. But God blessed me with a good job that I was able to support and provide enough for my daughter. Her father provide something for her, too especially when he has extra money. When Nonet is sick, I often get absent from work. Although she has my mother, mama still wanted me around when Nonet is sick. I remember one time, when I decided to go to work instead of staying at home, my mother and my sister rushed her to the hospital during the wee hours of the morning. Due to high fever and asthma, my daughter’s toes are turning violet already. My mother was so nervous, then. Since then, as much as possible, she wanted me to be around when our baby is sick.
I have been absent for two days now because Nonet has high fever. Gladly, she is not having any asthma attack. Otherwise, she would be confined at the hospital by now.

Since, I wanted to provide Nonet the best that I can give her, I have considered of working overseas. I believe that I would be able to earn thrice or even four times what I am getting now. But for some reasons, I am not able to own a passport. It’s not that my name is blacklisted or something, but every time I attempt to get a passport, something would happen which prevents me from getting one. Maybe, when my purpose of getting a passport is for travel and leisure only; maybe then I would be able to get one. :)

The news about the 13-year old boy hanging himself to death caught me because I am a mother. In the reports, the boy felt unloved and was longing so much for his mother. He needed maternal care and attention. He needed the love of his mother. He needed his mother.

His mother was away because she needs to work for her family. The child was a product of a broken family. If he had a father to take care of them and to provide for them, his mother wouldn’t need to work and be away from her children. But the mother didn’t have any choice. :(

I realized that in spite of the material things that a child receives from his or her parents; the most important gift that a child receives from his parents are still love and care.

Today, many parents are working and children are left under the care of their grandparents or nannies. I do not deny the fact that my daughter is also left under the care of my mother because I need to go to work to provide for her. Yet, I see to it that at least once or twice a month or whenever our budget allows, Nonet and I go on a date. I make a point to spend quality time with her at the mall. We eat at her favorite fast food. We play at amusement park. We go a little shopping. I buy her a toy, a book or new clothes. Sometimes, she requests for a movie disc. :)

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At home, when I am reading book, she also grabs her own book and she reads beside me. When she is tired of reading, she would ask me to read a story from her Children’s Bible. She loves that book so much. :) If I am being lazy reading or telling her story, I will just ask her to draw something. Sometimes, we play chess. You bet, she knows how to play chess. She even enjoys playing chess in computer. I don’t know how to play chess. She just teaches me how to move the pins. :P These are just few of the many things, that parents can do to spend quality time with their children. Things which will make their children feel loved and cared for.

I am aware that many parents need to do a lot of sacrifices leaving their children behind to work far away to provide for them, too. But the point is, our children needs love, care and attention above all material things.

Holy Family, bless the Filipino Families and all the families in the world! Amen.

Ciao! :)

A Mother’s Love

motherhood, Something Good No Comments »

When you just read the title of Mitch Albom’s novel, For One More Day, you would already have an idea that the main character of the story would ask for another day; maybe to go back to the day where he wanted to correct things he wanted to do otherwise; or wanted to do something which he has not done, which he is supposed to. For one more day.. If you will be given a chance to go back to a certain day in your life, what would it be?

I asked that question to myself long before I started reading through the book’s pages. To be honest, it took me a while to decide which day, would it be. I tried to balance the days that I wanted to go back and do the things I should have and I shouldn’t have. I thought about the things it would do in the future. It was really a headache! :)

Since, I have been asked to have an absolute voice rest by the ENT doctor I have seen due to acute laryngitis, I have all the time to read and finish my new book. ? I cannot work effectively in a call center, if I am asked to do voice rest by the specialist. :)

At first I found the book boring. It wasn’t as exciting as the Five People You Meet in Heaven. But, as I continue reading through its pages until the last, I was able to appreciate the book. I love the story. ? I was able to appreciate more my mother and I as a mother, too. :)

Indeed the book is not only about Charley spending another day with his dead mother, but it is a story of a mother; a story about mother’s love for her family and especially for her children. It is a story of how a mother would stand for her children. How she would endure the sacrifices and the pain she would endure for her children. :)

“..when you look at your mother, you are looking at the purest love you will ever know.”
(For One More Day, Mitch Albom)

After reading the book, I think of how many more sacrifices I will have to bear for my daughter. She’s only five years old and I have a long way to go. I am scared for I do not how I would be able to raise her and feed her and send her to school like my mother did to us. But, I know that I would be able to do so with God’s help and mercy and with my family sticking around.

I am thankful to God for giving our family a mother like us. She’s not the perfect mother but she’s the greatest. :)

“..parents.. if they love you, will hold you safely, above their swirling waters, and sometimes that means you’ll never know what they endured, and you may treat them unkindly, in a way you otherwise wouldn’t.
But there’s a story behind everything. How a picture got on a wall. How a scar got on your face. Sometimes the stories are simple, and sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking. But behind all your stories is always your mother’s story, because here is where yours begins

Ciao! :)

Being a Mother

It's my Life, motherhood 1 Comment »

It was in the 1994 Miss Universe Pageant when Miss India, Sushmita Sen won the said title. In the question and answer portion of the said pageant, she was asked with What is the essence of being a woman. What is the essence of being a woman? She answered, “”Just being a woman is God’s gift. The origin of a child is a mother, a woman. She shows a man what sharing, caring, and loving is all about. That is the essence of a woman”… The origin of a child is a mother. A mother is a woman.. :)

Last Sunday, May 8, we remember the woman who carried us in her womb for nine months; the one who takes care of us; the one who taught us how to walk; our first best friend; our first teacher; our first lawyer and many other things.. our mother. :)

We celebrated Mother’s Day without mama at home because she was still in Antique. We just called her and greeted a Happy Mother’s Day. :) I also sent a text message to my Tito Lino and asked him to do me a favor by greeting my maternal grandmother, Lola Sayong and her sisters a happy mom’s day, too. I received many test messages as well from friends and cousins greeting me a Happy Mother’s Day. :)

I was greeted too by my own daughter with a warm embrace and a kiss. It was a great feeling! I have been a mother for 6 years now (and counting) and I would say that it’s a tough job but a fulfilling one. Many of you may agree that it is easy to become a mother but it is difficult to be called one.

When you bear a child and gave birth to him, you are a mother. But, the responsibility of being a mother and becoming a mother may be easier said than one. I am lucky to have a mother as caring, as kind, as understanding and as loving as my mother. She may not have a college degree and was not born to a rich family, but she was able to fulfill and continue to fulfill her duty as a mother to my sisters and me, and also to my baby. I salute her. :)

My mother has sacrificed a lot of things for us. I remember her selling bath soaps in the market early in the morning, so when she got home, we have food to eat, and we have money to go to school. Up until today, even if we are all grown ups, she is still there to take care of us. When my mother arrived from Antique, she told us that her mother decided to stay with her eldest son. My mom’s eldest brother is sick and my grand mother (who is 82 years old already), wanted to be with her sick son. I believe that being a mother doesn’t have any expiration date. Once you become a mother, you will be one for the rest of your life. :)

I believe that I have been a good mother so far to my daughter. I may not always beside her because I need to go to work, but I see to it that I attend to all her needs, not only financially but emotionally as well. I never forget to say I love you to my little girl everyday. :)

I know that my “motherhood” is just starting and I have a long way to go. I may have fears inside me that I may not be able to provide enough for my daughter, but I have my mother and her life as one to inspire me. :)

Ciao! :)

Flowers on Mother’s Day

Feast and Festivities, motherhood No Comments »

On Sunday, May 8, we again will honor again the great woman in our lives; the woman who bore us for nine months, who gave birth to us, and nourish us; the one who took care of us when we were babies, and who continues to take care of us and our children; our mother. :)

I know that our mothers differ from each other. Some may be kind and sweet. Some may be strict and firm. Others may just don’t care. Others may not be really acting as a mother. Nevertheless, in spite of all their shortcomings and flaws, we should not forget to appreciate and be thankful for bringing us on earth.

I am thankful to God, that He has blessed me and my sisters with a good mother. She may not be a perfect mother, but she is kind and understanding one. I know that not all of us have been blessed to have with a kind and loving mother. But, we should not forget that though our biological mother may not care enough for us, there is someone who loves us all so dearly. She would never turn her back from us. She would never stop loving and praying for us. She would always be there for all of us; Mama Mary. :)

So, on mother’s day, do not forget to say thank you and I love you to your mothers. I am a mother, too and I know how much it would mean to your own mothers. A little appreciation like calling flower delivery men to hand over a bouquet, or a stem of rose with a warm kiss will do. :)

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Ciao! :)

Quality Time With Nonet :)

Little Antoinette, motherhood 1 Comment »

My new shift gives me time to spend quality time with my daughter. I love this shift! :) My shift starts at 5AM and ends at 2PM. I usually arrive at home by 2:45PM. If Nonet is not sleeping yet, we eat snacks together and will take a nap. Late in the afternoon, after doing her assignments, I let her play on the computer. Sometimes, we let her play outside or watch over our kittens. :)

In the evening after we finish eating dinner, we go to shower together. :) After putting on our sleep clothes, we will settle on bed and I will read to her. I love to read. I love books! I have bought her number of books as well. :) She loves to looking at pictures and asking what is it about. Her latest craze is about astronomy. My sister Patty introduced her the moon, the planets and even Laika, the first living thing in space. She even told me about the black hole and supernova. Sometimes she forget about it though but when she is reminded, she remembers. :)

She also loves the story of Jack and the Beanstalk. She always asked my mother or me to tell her that story. She never gets tired of hearing it. :)

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We also sing and dance together. :) I hope I’ll remain in this shift. I really love it. :)

Ciao! :)

Antoinette is the Sunshine of My Life

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I am working on my blog this early this morning when my daughter greeted me a, good morning! She is used to getting up early because her class is at 10Am and she loves watching Sponge Bob Square Pants and Dora the Explorer on channel 2. Since she woke up early than Dora and Sponge’s time slot, she asked me to carry her first and sang for her.

My computer is playing, “You are the Sunshine of My Life” by Stevie Wonder. As I sang the song to her, she fell asleep again. :)

Having a baby really turned my world around. My daughter has been my inspiration and strength. She has always been the sunshine during the low moments of life.

I thank the Lord for the wonderful gift He gave me.

Ciao! :)

A Mom Like Mine :)

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We always hear that being a mother is one of the most fulfilling profession one can ever had. It a tough one though but we always wanted our children to be proud of us. I must admit that I am very lucky to have a mother like my mom. I have witnessed all her hard work and sacrifices for us. I remember when my father lingered somewhere someplace, :P , it is my mother who have been a provider for us. Oh we really had a hard time then. Thanks to God for the dear angels He sent to help us. God bless them. :)

When I learned that I was pregnant, I couldn’t tell my mother about it. I know she’ll be very upset. Not because I haven’t finish school yet but the complexity of ney’s and I relationship. In fact, I am the bread winner of the family when I got pregnant. It was so hard keeping my pregnancy from her. I knew that my mother knows her daughter very well. She noticed that I was not wearing any tight jeans anymore and that I often wear slacks or low-waist pants. She also found the garlic garland I hanged on my window. Hahaha!!! Oh yeah, I was very scared of aswang then. :P

We didn’t speak to each other for a week after I told her about my pregnancy. She even commented before that she will never take care of my baby.

Everything changed when I showed her my first ultrasound. Since then, she was the one who accompanied me in my check ups especially when ney is not around. When I gave birth, I cried when I saw her. She told me not to cry anymore and that I did a good job. :)

To be honest, she was the one and she is the one who continually raise my daughter. She even told us that she loved Antoinette more than us, her own daughters. Hahaha! My sisters love my baby so much as well. I am lucky because, I have her to look after my daughter while I am working. I know that my baby is in good hands. She never gets tired of my daughter. She’s very patient in teaching her lessons while I am very fond of buying Antoinette books. :)

Even if she’s in her late 50′s already, she still do the laundry for us and cook for us. My mother is a best cook. Well, you can tell by our sizes! Hehehe! :D

I know that I can never be like her. I am not sure if I can. My daughter is very lucky to have her as her granny. She practically takes good care of us. I am very grateful to God for giving her to us as our mother. It is really amazing how she manage raising not 3 but 4 daughters! :)

I just wanted to share you how blessed I am to have her. I always pray to God to bless her with good health and longer life. I just don’t know how we will be without her. Even if I have I am a mother now, I still depend on her. And I love her so much.

I know that sometimes, we often take our mothers for granted. But, let us remember that we can have many children, we can have many lovers, but we can only have one mother. And as early as now, let them feel how much you love them and be mindful of saying, “Thanks for everything Mom! I love you.” That would definitely makes her happy. :)

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Ciao! :)

A Mother’s Touch

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My daughter is suffering from asthma. She actually has bronchial and skin asthma. She was diagnosed to have one when she was only about 6 months old. It was the first time that she was confined at the hospital because she was fed with peanuts. We didn’t know then that she has asthma. Her pediatrician told us that the triggers for bronchial and skin asthma are the same. It is expected that when she suffers bronchial asthma she will be suffering from skin asthma as well. She’ll turn 5 years old this October and I am praying that she’ll get over asthma before turning seven years old.

She has medication to skin asthma. Believe me the medications are expensive. The price of her prescribed lotion are thrice as much as what I am using. She often has difficulty in sleeping because she always feels itchy. Sometimes, I really lose my patience when I scratch her back her arms her head her legs. :( Last night, when I put her to bed, I told her that instead of rubbing her back (like she always asks as to do), I told her that I will just massage her. I applied lotion on her back and I massage her as gently and relaxing as I can. Then her chest, her feet and her hands. She fell asleep very soundly. We didn’t have a fight because I easily gets irritated when I scratch her back and head.

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I know already that my daughter loves being massage. I know also that a massage especially a mother’s touch can heal not only physical pain but also emotional pain. Mom’s touch brings comfort and security.

Happy massaging fellow mothers!

Ciao! :)

A visit to Baby Johan

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My dear friend Pinky gave birth to a healthy baby boy last January 20 of this year. Her 3 beautiful friends (Me, Daisy and Ime) decided to visit her and the new baby last Saturday. The three of us came from a night shift work and we were all sleepy. We met at Robinson’s Galleria in Ortigas and then we went to ES Transport in Cubao. We took the bus bound to Cabanatuan which will pass by Plaridel, Bulacan; our destination. It took us about an hour and a half before reaching Pinky’s house.

Baby Johan was fast asleep when we arrived. Oh he is a very handsome baby! I am so glad that he got most of his features and his skin tone from her mother Pinky. The naughty mother showed us her little one’s priceless possession! Well, this baby will not need any testosterone booster when he grows up! :)

Pinky’s mom cooked a bountiful lunch for us. My hunger has been satiate! :) The four of us talked about a lot of things. Daisy and I shared our own experiences with Pinky when we gave birth. These three are not only my friends but my sisters, too. How I miss them. :)

Before going home, Pinky’s father got us Indian mangoes from their trees. I’ve got a lot! It was heavy though, but I love to eat mangoes as well as my family. :) We’ll go back there on baby Johan’s baptism. I hope and pray that God will bless him with good health and good luck.

Ciao! :)

New Baby is Coming

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I, Daisy and Ime were very happy when we learned that our dear friend Pinky is going to have a baby! :) It is true what they say about babies being the bundle of joy to every family. We haven’t seen Pinky for a long time and she said that she is due on the 3rd week of January.  Well, it would be very soon!!! We are planning to visit her one of this days and I bet that Pinky got already some modern furniture for her baby. :)

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I remember when I learned that I was carrying a baby. It was mixed emotions, then! :) I was happy and excited to have a baby, but scared that I may not be able to be a good mother. Well, my mother played a big role to what I become. I may say that so far, I have been a good mother to my little girl. :)

We are still yet to set a date as to when we will pay her a visit. I am really excited to see her. She said that she really gained weight. :)

I just hope and pray that Pinky would have a safe delivery and that she would deliver a healthy baby. God bless them! :) We’ll see her soon.

Ciao! :)

Always a Pure Heart

motherhood, Something Good No Comments »

The way of man is forward and strange: but as for the pure, his work is right. (Proverbs 21:8)

Lord, I want to have pure thought and a pure heart. Only with You is this possible. On my own I’m full of wickedness. This is not what I want my children to see; I want them to see a mother who has a heart and mind like Jesus.

Some days, when I feel like I’m experiencing a spiritual high, it’s easy to think pure and upright thoughts and to walk in Your ways. On days when I’m having spiritual struggles, my thoughts become full of discouragement and frustration, and that invades my actions and attitudes.

I don’t like to be so controlled by emotions, Father. Please give me the strength to be pure in every situation.

(From: Prayers and Promises for Mothers)

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Ciao! :)

A Date with Mom

It's my Life, motherhood 1 Comment »

My mother celebrated her 56th birthday last October 6. As a birthday present, she asked for a pair of sandals. I told her to prepare herself and we’ll go to the mall. Well, this happened about 2 Saturdays ago. Since it was my off from work, I decided to take her to the mall. It was the right timing, too because, I just received then my salary.

She was able to pick a nice pair of sandals. I also bought my daughter and my youngest sister a pair of slippers. After paying to the cashier, my mother told me if we could go to home center of the mall. We went to the lower ground of the mall, and she looked at different Christmas decors available already. She loves the color green very much and she admired one of the white Christmas trees on display with green accents and decors. :)

She picked two sets of Christmas lights and headed to the counter. Then, we continue strolling around the mall and I bought some thread for my cross-stitch projects and of course, new books. :)

We ate at Aunt Anne Pretzels, for a change. On our way home my mother told me that in spite of many hardships in life and in spite of  being very hardheaded at times, she said that I am still blessed and more fortunate than many people are. I know where my mother comment is going. Recently, I learned that my father’s sister used my money to pay for her niece debt. She told me that my cousin would be in big trouble if she would not help her. I was really mad because I am earning it for my daughter’s schooling. It made me more upset that after my aunt paid my cousin’s loan, my cousin would not do anything to pay that money back. I was forced to text them and really made them feel that I am angry. Then my aunt told me that they have no means to pay my money back, besides, I will still be able to earn it back. Oh, I really felt bad about it. :(

Then my mother told me to just forget about it. It was just money. It may cost a lot but there are a lot of money out there. Besides, I am truly blessed and all I need to do is to count my blessings to make me feel better.

She’s right. In spite of all my shortcomings and sins, God continues to bless me and my family. Well, my date with my mother was very enjoyable and meaningful. :) My mother is really one of a kind, she’s one of the best mothers in the world.

Ciao! :)

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